Another week, another post!!
I have to admit, I was surprised to see this as having received the most votes this week. Can’t quite put my finger on why I’m surprised, just that I am.
First I should elaborate on what a milestone consists of. There are two different types of milestones: physical (like those mentioned in the title) and cognitive. I will focus today on physical milestones, mostly because those tend to disrupt sleep in a very obvious way.
As a reminder, this post is about protecting sleep during milestones. This implies that your child is already sleep trained, or at least well on their way to being sleep trained. Much of the advice will not apply if you are still helping your child fall asleep for naps, bedtime, and/or throughout the night.
Babies usually progress through their milestones in the following order: rolling, sitting, rocking on knees/crawling, standing, and walking. I’ll go through each one of these and how to deal, but you’ll start to see I sound like a broken record 😉
Rolling:
Ahhh, the one that started it all. I remember when my son first started rolling in his crib, I’d try to “pin” him down by securing a blanket tightly around his body and tucking it into the sides of his crib. That bought me, oh, about 18 hours of no rolling, then he broke through it. Since most parents start their babies sleeping on their backs (AS THEY SHOULD), this means baby is rolling from back to stomach. I always advise my clients to chat with their pediatricians on what to do when baby starts rolling. Almost all pediatricians seem to suggest that if your child flips on their own, you’re okay to leave them that way to sleep. A few peds will suggest rolling them back to their backs until a certain age…but that often causes a jack-in-the-box effect; you roll baby, baby rolls back, and on and on for hours. If you’re concerned about stomach sleeping, as I was, there are now several products on the market, including the Hi Sense Baby Monitor and the Snuza, and soon the amazing Sproutling.
One thing I would suggest all new parents remember is that your baby is not the first baby in the history of the world to roll! In my opinion, it is rarely, if ever, a wise choice to physically restrict your child from moving the way they’d like to in the crib. Having said that, many parents have found that switching their baby into a Merlin Magic Sleep Suit seems to keep the rolling at bay for anywhere from a few weeks to a few months!
If you find your child is rolling and is very unhappy about it, I would recommend employing whatever sleep training method you used the first time you helped your child learn to fall asleep on their own. You can check-in, you can cry-it-out, or anything in between, but my recommendation is to either try the Merlin, or with doctor’s consent, leave them be and let them sleep on their stomachs. As an aside, I find that children tend to sleep more soundly once they’ve learned to roll and flip – the more freedom they have to move (around the 4 month mark and beyond), the happier they are. Do you like being stuck sleeping in just one position all night?
Sitting, Rocking on Knees/Crawling
I also vividly remember the first time I caught my daughter sitting in her crib! I didn’t own a video monitor (ah to be poor and married while your husband attends law school) so it was quite a shock to walk in and see a sitting child where I’d left a prone one!
These milestones really trip parents up because they feel they need to “knock” their littles one over in order to try to compel them to go to sleep. Often with sitting, babies don’t cry, they just don’t sleep. They either take forever to fall asleep because they get stuck sitting up, or they end their nap early and just sit around, haha. What you want to keep in mind is that the crib is often your child’s only place to truly be free! They will love to practice all their skills there. So, my advice is the same as above, and especially if your child does not seem sad or upset about their state, it’s better to just leave them be. Set a minimum amount of time for their nap, usually 60-90 minutes, and allow them to stay in their crib for that amount of time, even if they wake early. If you find that sitting/rocking/crawling keeps them awake, give them about the same amount of time to fall to sleep for a nap, then retry your nap again later. The less you interfere, the faster they’ll “get it”. Also, try to teach/show them how to fall over/lay down during their waking hours. It may just help them figure out how to get out of the sitting position in their crib.
Babies will often want to “try out” a new skill over and over and over again over a 3-5 day window, then sort of be “over it” once they’ve mastered it…all the more reason to stay out of their way. The faster they master the skill, the faster they’ll get back to lengthier sleep periods.
Standing and Walking:
Next to rolling, I think standing is the hardest milestone for parents to deal with. This is because most babies legitimately get stuck in the standing position and can’t figure out how to get down. But, guess what happens when Mom comes in to lay the standing baby down? That’s right, just like that jack-in-the-box that baby jumps right back up again!
My advice is largely the same as above, and I would also suggest standing your baby in their crib and showing them how to slide down. Again, like all of these milestones, if you just keep out of it to the extent possible and do not help your babies fall back to sleep, it will pass within just a few days. It’s only when you start to introduce new sleep associations that you run into problems.
Getting Caught in the Corner:
I don’t consider this a milestone, but it is a physical issue that seems to frustrate a lot of parents. My clients are often asking if they can/should “reposition” their baby if they appear to scrunched up in the corner of the crib or if they simply otherwise appear to be in what looks like an uncomfortable position.
If you don’t have anything in your child’s crib, you shouldn’t necessarily need to reposition your baby, as long as you’re able to verify that they’re breathing. Again, this is a question that should first be asked to your pediatrician. Another caution to keep in mind is breathable bumpers. These are popular with my clients as well, but I have personally witnessed a small 5 month old flip to his side, then belly, then scrunch up to the crib and shove his face on the *only* piece of solid fabric on the whole breathable bumper. I prefer to have the mattress, the fitted sheet, and the baby in the crib, nothing more. Perhaps a tiny lovie is fine, but by and large the crib would seem to be the safest place in the entire house, perhaps even safer than their carseat.
Thanks for reading! Please remember to follow me on www.facebook.com/babysleeptrainer.com and be sure to share, comment, and like this post!!
Thanks for sharing all of your insight! I like to use the breathable bumpers once baby can move around quite a bit. Both of my kids have managed to gets their legs stuck between the slats, ouch! It also helped keep the favorite doll in the crib during the toddler months:)
Hi Natalie, what would you suggest for babies who are starting to roll but are not sleep trained yet? My DS is only 14 weeks old and still needs help falling sleeping for naps and at bedtime. Once he wakes up from rolling over he cries and can’t go back to sleep. Please help
Hi Nina,
I would suggest trying the Merlin suit. Also, keep in mind that 14 weeks is a good time to start sleep training. The rolling won’t be an issue once he knows how to put himself to sleep without any help.
I swear one of the most frustrating milestones was the standing. I lost count of the amount of times I had to lay my terrible sleeper back down in his cot as he stood up and didn’t know what to do. Down up down up down up down up etc LOL
Busy Kids, standing is HARD! And I feel that it effects their sleep longer than rolling or crawling.
At the age of around 3 months, when put on his stomach, your infant will lift his head and shoulders high, utilizing his arms for backing. This smaller than usual pushup helps to reinforce the muscles which he’ll use to roll over.
Never put your child to sleep on their stomach at any age.
My child cries so much she throws up because she can’t get herself to lay back down to sleep. What do I do for this? Just clean up and try again?
This isn’t that uncommon <3 I'd ask your pediatrician about what to do in this case. In my case many will tell you to clean up the child and immediately continue.
Hi Natalie,
How do I sleep train if my son is rolling over. He cries when he rolls over. How do I distinguish from him crying because he is learning how to fall asleep vs crying because he rolled over. Or do I treat them the same and just let him cry.
Before you start sleep training, ask your pediatrician “What should I do when my baby rolls to their belly during sleep?” Then, do what your doctor says. All kids cry at first when rolling <3 Typically with time they learn to be more comfortable with time.
When my 9 month old was waking up in the middle of the night i was able to rub her back or stand by her crib for a while until she eventually put herself back to sleep. Now she just sits up and protests. She still is crying but I don’t know how to soothe her back to sleep if she isnt lying down so now i end uppicking her up which i know is wrong when sleep training
When you started to interact with her, that was assisting her to sleep”. Now, she has lost the ability (or willingness) to fall back to sleep on her own. Use whatever technique or method you originally used to sleep train her for naps and bedtime, but for the middle of the night waking.
Early wake ups!!! Hi! 5 month old here, independent sleeper for naps and night time sleep, goes down easily and can get himself to sleep in the night if he wakes easily.my question is- his natural and beloved bedtime is 6pm, tried moving it later gradually but doesn’t seem to work as well. I would be happy with a 6am wake up but he wakes up at around 5am and then seems tired after 1.5 hours and goes back to sleep for 45 mins then I feel like our normal day starts, whereas the rest of the day he has about a 2 hour wake window. Any way to get him to wake up at 6 or just need to move bedtime later? He ends up having 3 sometimes 4 naps at this rate which I feel is too much for his age. Thank you so much and sorry for the long question!
if you keep letting him go back to sleep 45 mins later, you’ll keep having this issue. I’d just start your day at 6 (as long as he’s safe in his crib before that time) and keep him up til his first scheduled nap time. Give him 2+ weeks and he’ll adjust.